“Harei At Mekudeshet Li Be-Tabaat Zo K’Dat Moshe Ve-Israel” – “Behold you are sanctified (betrothed) to me with this ring, according to the Law of Moses and Israel.” Among the many preparations for a wedding ceremony is the purchase of the Jewish wedding rings. However, not everyone is aware of the fact that there are different customs which accompany this ancient beautiful tradition.
The beginning of the tractate of “Kidushin”, the first mishna teaches that a woman is acquired by a man through money. The Jewish law, Halacha, states that the minimum measurement of this money is a pruta or something with the equivalent value of the pruta. Today, the value of a pruta is around 1 cent. Although technically one wed with any piece of Jewish Jewelry, nonetheless, the common custom in the Jewish world today is to wed with a ring. The constant wearing of the ring is a permanent reminder throughout life of the unique bond they share with their spouse.
Although the popular custom is to acquire a wife with a gold ring, some believe, like the Kabala, that a silver ring is actually better. As says the “Ben Ish Chai” – “It is a fine Mitzvah to acquire with a silver ring…a ring that surrounds the finger is a sign of the surrounding light she receives by the marriage…” And he adds in a different place – “The letters of the word “Gold” – Zahav, are descending (in gimatriya – zayin=7, heh=5, bet=2), as oppose to the letters of the word Silver – Kesef, which increase (kaf=20, samech=60, peh=80). This is a good sign that the match will be good and rise high.
Many people, who are accustomed to purchasing silver rings, buy their future wives a gold ring as well. This is due to the fact that most brides today are acquired with a gold ring, and should a man give his bride “only” a silver ring, she may hold it against him, thinking he is cheap, cares less for her, etc. Also, a silver ring tends to blacken and is less comfortable to wear on a permanent basis, which is another reason to give a gold ring in the first place.
Either way, a groom should make sure that the ring is not made of mixed metals but of pure gold or silver. Also, he has to make sure the karat (percentage of gold) is not short of what is the custom in the bride’s country.
Some wrote, according to the Kabala, that the wedding ring should have a special shape – round on the inside, square on the outside, which is a symbol for – “good signs and good fortune” – “Siman Tov V’Mazal Tov”. Most of these rings have rounded corners, yet some are strict that the corners be sharp. This of course makes the ring quite uncomfortable to wear… The wedding ring can be worn on any finger the bride chooses, and some like to engrave their names on the interior band after the wedding.
A very popular modern line of jewish wedding rings today is the “Ani L’dodi” rings, meaning “I am to my Beloved and my Beloved is to me”. This verse was written by the great King Solomon in his holy book – Song of Songs, making these rings a very biblical way of expressing ones love to the other. In addition, many jewelers offer a wide range of verses that can be engraved onto the ring, such as – “Matzati et Sheahava Nafshi”, meaning “I found that which my soul loves” – a very touching verse also written by King Solomon in his Song of Songs.
Baltinester Bros. operate an online store which specializes among others in Jewish Jewelry, special Judaica gifts, Gold name jewelry and Silver name Jewelry.